RESPECT FOR OUR FELLOW DRIVERS

I keep hearing about the good old days in the industry when the truck driver was the hero of the highway. If you needed help, it was a guarantee that the trucker driver would be the one to stop and help out. Heck, they used to sing songs about us. Good songs too. We were once considered courageous, noble, and self sacrificing professionals. Now, if you call someone a professional, it's almost an insult. Some of the guys out here will go out of their way to prove they cannot be trusted or respected by anyone. Especially not by other drivers.

Where have all the good guys gone? What happened to the hero, the dedication, the respect? Did we, somewhere along the line, get tired of being the knights of the road and of having to live up to the good guy image?

In truth, I have no idea where the knights have gone. Perhaps their song has been silenced by the voice of time, the demands of more money, faster and cheaper freight and a great deal less freedom. I do know this, I miss them very much. I miss too the ideals that went with them. The ethics that grown men once strived to live up to, in a time belonging to some other generation, not our own. Perhaps the way things once were, will live on only in the memories of those who choose not to forget. There was a time when the driver's respect for one another was paramount. But that time is almost faded now.

Why do some drivers go out of their way to put other drivers down and to ridicule those who take pride in the work they do? Why do some of us deliberately make it difficult for others out here? Are we buying into the theory that hard work and self respect is something to be ridiculed, laughed at and despised?

There have been a few times in my life when I desperately wish I had answers for the questions that haunted me. But none more so than these. In truth, I have no idea how to get the drivers to support one another. Perhaps I am too much of an idealist but I believe there might still be hope for this industry. I have to believe it because the alternative simply isn't acceptable to me or the millions of drivers who have made this job their life's work. How can we get things to change when most of the drivers are unwilling to take a stand against the bullies on the road?

The thing which breaks my heart is that this industry is made up of grown men and women. Adults. Some drivers get on the radio and act like juveniles but there isn't a one of them who would act this way around their parents. Mom and Dad would smack them off the chair if they spoke at the dinner table the way they rant on the radio. How many of the loud mouths on the radio talk like this in front of their wives?

I hate to blame it on any one entity but perhaps that is the only way to find a solution. Maybe, (and this is only my opinion) the radio is part of the problem. In all honesty, I have a radio but I very rarely use it. It's on maybe one or two hours a week and that's only if there is an incoming storm or heavy traffic. It's not that I can't take a joke, because in truth, I have a wickedly funny sense of humor. I just get fed up with the garbage I hear on it when I finally do turn it on. Within five minutes of hitting that switch, I am hearing someone whispering about their underwear or someone else yelling for a commercial beaver. It's demoralizing.

There are those rare occasions when my husband and I run together and we will go to a different channel so we can talk to one another. It is depressing to know that some guys will track us down to see what we are talking about. Someone will make an obscene comment and I will turn the radio off and call my husband on the cell phone just so we can talk without interruption.

Over the past ten years, in spite of my love for this industry and my gratitude for all it has given me, there have been times when I wanted to throw in the towel. This is not something I find easy to admit. In fact, it pains me a great deal to give in to the notion that there are people on the road with us in whom I can find no redeeming qualities.

Does this make them beyond redemption? No, it does not. It simply means I have a personal problem dealing with the amount of disrespect I receive from them. To me, there is a big difference between respect and disrespect. No matter how little respect my fellow driver has for me, it is no excuse to treat me with blatant disrespect. Common courtesy demands a modicum of kindness among strangers. I believe that treating a driver with disrespect simply because she is a woman is the same, no better no worse, as treating someone with disrespect because of the color of their skin.

Whatever happened to doing unto others as you would have them do unto you? Have we as drivers lost the right to fair treatment by our peers simply because of our gender? If we as women can do the job, then why can't we be accepted? Do our male counterparts think we aren't up to the task to which we find ourselves engaged? While it is true I have met (over the course of ten years) the occasional helpless driver, I have never held it against them or treated them with disrespect simply because they had trouble backing up or sliding their tandems.

Male or female we are all expected to do our job. In the end, all we are asking for is equal treatment by our peers. We as women, are not asking to be treated like royalty, we only want to be treated with dignity for the job that we do.

Am I being too sensitive to the situation? Maybe, I should be a good sport and laugh off the insults and the degrading remarks. But I cannot. It may be a serious character flaw of mine, but I do not see the humor in insulting or verbally abusing another driver. Maybe I should recognize the situation for what it is. That a driver was merely taking advantage of the opportunity to amuse themselves at my expense. When it comes right down to it, I should consider the source of the remarks made and understand where the heckler is coming from. Maybe this clown suffers from a lack of self esteem and my ability to handle the job, rubs some people the wrong way. I suppose I should take the blame for the whole incident. After all, if I wasn't out here competing for my share of the work, this person would never have felt so threatened.

Nevertheless, there are times when I grow weary of all the bickering out here and the endless insults thrown in my direction. Sometimes the degree of cruelty amazes me and it is all I can do to draw a breath and try to shake it off.

I try so hard not to allow the ignorance of some people to alter my overall opinion of this industry. I try always to concentrate on the positive and to write about uplifting and encouraging topics. But there are times when this takes a great deal of effort. Sometimes more effort than I can exert. There have been a few moments when I wanted to write something that would blister the offender or to put on paper the words that would make their spirit wither in shame and self loathing.

However, this ability to write is a gift, and a profound one at that. Like all gifts, it should not to be abused. I temper my emotion and in spite of how I might feel, I pick up my rose colored glasses, put pen to paper and offer encouragement to those who have to deal with more than their fair share of idiots and morons.

I am starting to understand the idea behind the freedom of speech clause in our constitution. Just as I have the God given right to rail against the injustices we face at the hands of our fellow drivers, they in turn, have the right to express their biased and prejudiced views regardless of the feelings evoked. Does this make it fair? Not at all. But were we to censor someone else's views would be to deny our own right to say what we understand to be morally just and true.

Ultimately there will always be those who like the dregs of society, take great pleasure in being as insulting as they possibly can. But remember, no matter how loud they may get, their opinions are subject to the freedom we have, to disagree.

Julie Fricker